Does it always have to be this way?

It's been 8 years of relationship and 3 years of marriage. Of which 2 years we're blessed with a beautiful baby boy. But we never go to bed together. Hardly. I have not turned to u (oh dear blog) for a long time now to listen to the stories of my heart. I got no one to talk to, nowhere to turn, no postings on FB and not even on Mummies Connect (MC) anymore because every time someone replies, hub will tend to read it later on and I have friends who are in MC as well.

Thanks for being my only friend now. It's not that I lead an unhappy marriage. Well as they always say, marriage takes two. Just like parenthood. But looks like I'm the one doing the job most of the time and hub is just around to play or do the light stuffs. Every night after I put kiddo to bed, it's always me ALONE in the dark, with my loyal iPad as my company. Each time I browse friends pics on FB, I feel a sense of loneliness, regret that I do not have BFF to call my won. How sad can that be?

Hub was out with a different group of friends this afternoon. And now he's out again with another group. Our only contact was having lunch together today, that's it. Although I look forward to dinner at mom's every Saturday, I also dread seeing hub's face. It's as if our family is in his debt. I really don't know how to face my parents. I'm sorry daddy, I'm sorry mommy. 

Well, does it always have to be this way? When will the skies look brighter? Only god knows.